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- Mar 7, 2017
- 5 min
How I Met a Nearly-Naked Kevin Costner in His Living Room
Did I ever tell you about the time I met a nearly-naked Kevin Costner in his living room? Here's how it happened. Let's hop in the...


- Feb 17, 2017
- 9 min
A Gentle Love Letter to Menopause - With Swearing
Dear Menopause, Look, you fucking cunt-faced bag of rabid dicks, I’m calling you out. Show up and fight me like a woman. You’ve been...


- Feb 5, 2017
- 4 min
Claritin D Hallucinations
Claritin D is a psychoactive hallucinagen for me. It's the D part that does it and I'm starting to suspect that it always has. Which...


- Jan 31, 2017
- 4 min
The Chihuahua That Poops Pearls
At 2 a.m. this morning, I was awakened by dozens of tiny but annoying stabbing sensations in my butt and I reached down under the covers to


- Jan 29, 2017
- 1 min
A Miracle Written in Doggy Snot
This is a noseprint that Gemma left on the mirror behind my bedroom door and what I clearly see scrawled in doggy snot is "I ❤️ U&quo


- Jan 24, 2017
- 3 min
I Will Always Love You Gemma Junebug
Yesterday my darling Great Dane puppy, Gemma Junebug, died during her spay surgery. This is a tribute to her and the amazing light she broug


- Jan 22, 2017
- 2 min
Mother F***ing Girl Power
I wore my pink pussyshirt (not a knitter so I had to substitute pussyshirt for pussyhat), AND I wore my Mother Fucking Girl Power socks....


- Jan 22, 2017
- 1 min
Horrible Genius
Wife: "I found this cute little dog outside... he' scared. I'm going to bring him inside. He seems cold." Husband: THAT


- Jan 16, 2017
- 4 min
My Mom, MLK and the Supernatural Greeting Card
Mom sent me the perfect card a few months after she died. In addition to losing Mom, we had just lost our house and our business to the Gre


- Jan 11, 2017
- 3 min
Invisibility Sucks
Paybacks are hell; even though things had started off so swimmingly, with the hubby telling me a delightful story of a friend of ours experi